Happy Easter to those who celebrate it! 😀
Living at Home
People don’t like being called immature. Yet they have no difficulty calling me immature. I’ll end up ranting later — right now there are people in the room and I’d rather have privacy for my rants. This hypocrisy is ridiculous.
Test Anxiety
I have two tests and a quiz tomorrow. Well, today, since it’s after midnight. I can’t sleep.
Naturally, I also have a two-page informal essay response thing due promptly at 9:30, which I haven’t completed yet because I’ve been studying for this damn test on Genesis.
I’ll probably work until 1:00, shower, and go to bed. That might work. I need at least three hours of sleep to function, so I could pull a 3:00 if I haven’t gotten the homework done. Hopefully that would give me enough time to print it in the morning–it should, since I cut a good fifteen minutes off my morning routine by showering tonight instead of after sunrise tomorrow.
Deep breaths. I can do this. I can do this. I met with a study partner person yesterday. It’s just three passages. Identification of passage, speakers, context. How the passage characterizes the speakers. How the passage is relevant to two major motifs. Motifs are easy. Identification is easy, unless I need to know individual chapters. I didn’t need to know the individual books in Metamorphoses, though, so it’s unlikely.
Ick. I hate tests. I’ll probably be watching a lot of Friends tomorrow.
Three Dogs
My grandmother’s dog is staying at my house. He’s cute, and he tries to be good, but he can be a pain. He’s also solidified my belief that two dogs is fine, but three is much too many. Granted, he’s the only really high-maintenance dog in the house, as Little Dog is the calmest dog I have ever met and Big Dog is thirteen years old and just can’t run around like she used to. I need to go cuddle with Little Dog now.
Phosphorescent Jellyfish
Clarissa says that “Unless we force our mind into new directions, it will grow moldy.” The part of me fighting against my depression agrees. I’ve already changed a lot of things, but it isn’t enough. I’m still in the process of reworking my life, and it’s very difficult, to say the least. It’s very much a day-by-day battle. Sometimes it’s even a minute-by-minute battle.
And so I have started a new blog dedicated to the eradication of my own intellectual and mental stagnation: Phosphorescent Jellyfish. I’ll still be posting here–this is, after all, an important outlet for personal reflection. I just think a change like this is refreshing. I’ll be posting there at least once a week, highlighting things that are outright new, or that are just new to me. The focus will (likely) primarily be in the sciences. Anything on my personal research project will likely show up both here and there.
I haven’t decided whether this will be a permanent change from this blog, or just an addition, so for now it’s an addition. I guess we’ll just have to see where it goes.
Beds and Blankets
My grandmother was admitted to the ER yesterday. She’s fine, most of her symptoms were resolved, and she was admitted to be placed under observation. The crux of the matter — of course — is that the hospital was completely out of beds. So she overnighted in the ER gurney.
The best part of the day yesterday was the blankets. We asked for an extra, and got two. We were then told that if my grandmother was using them, they couldn’t be taken away.
For some reason it seemed so funny. There are no beds, but there are extra blankets. Apparently neither happens very often.
Resolutions
My birthday was on Sunday. I feel old for someone so unaccomplished. Kids my age are graduating college, and I’m only halfway through the decision of figuring out if I actually want to continue pursuing physics. I don’t have a job. I go to school part-time, two days a week. My room isn’t done.
But I have Batman socks, complete with capes, so I guess I’m happy?
I’ve started a new writing project. Again. Today I wrote 167 words over a course of…I actually can’t say how long, because I did part of it while we were watching a video in class. I’m pretty optimistic, since this is a project I’ve been dwelling on for weeks.
I’ve re-started on the writing critique site I haven’t been on in a really long while. I think it’s been three years.
I’ve reactivated my account on another site whose forums I haven’t visited in about six months or so.
I got recommended for honors classes at the school I’m attending while I’m on leave.
I changed my blog theme.
I restarted my research project, which was put on pause while I worked some stuff out. The analyses we’re doing in my Mythology class has helped me regain my motivation.
I restarted Final Fantasy Tactics Advance, and started a new game of Pokemon Rangers: Guardian Signs.
I’ve been very, very slowly building a new thing on Minecraft. I also discovered the Rabbit Spawn and Toast.
I went out for birthday french fries, milkshakes, and raspberry sorbet with my friend, whose birthday is close to mine. We also watched Black Death, a very depressing movie starring the guy who plays Boromir in LOTR (I am told his name is Sean Bean) and Eddie Redmayne, the hot guy who played Marius in the newest film production of Les Mis. The ending seems like a bit of a cop-out, I think, but we had fun.
I got 102% on my first psych exam (Social Psychology of the Holocaust, for those wondering).
I got to visit my friend back at school the week before last at her awesome new apartment. She even gets to keep her cat there, and the problems with the super-aggressive second cat are all resolved. I also got shinsplints.
I’m writing this post.
These aren’t resolutions, but I’m in some serious need of some self-care right now and this is helping a lot. This week and a half I’ve been pretty off–today I needed to take absences in Mythology and History (US History Since 1865, for those wondering) because of an anxiety attack I had over a missed reading assignment (I read the wrong dates on the syllabus) and a missed writing assignment (I was sick and forgot about it) shortly before Mythology was due to begin this morning. I hate taking days off for stuff like this, but I needed the time to do some serious thinking about perspective.
I got up this morning. I brushed my teeth and got a giant knot out of my hair. I got dressed, and I wore my new, awesome bra.
I am also getting a baby tree tomorrow for my birthday. I’m going to raise it as a bonsai. I want to know so badly what kind it is, but the lady at the store didn’t tell my mom, only that it’d be coming in on Wednesday.
Tonight my family is going to celebrate my birthday at a fancy Italian place. I’m going to have gnocchi, and it will be wonderful.
Coriander and Rye 